Paint Stripper

I know it has been a while since I have posted here, but I have a good excuse. It's was the aliens...not really, there just are no funny stories UNTIL NOW!

One of our field techs called in and said, "You will not believe this...". I had to hear this because I normally don't get many of these impossible to believe situations. "The other tech that talked to told him to use canned air to clean out the dispenser. Here is the kicker, the guy used Rustoleum Paint Stripper instead of canned air...", said our field tech. At this point I was totally speechless. I could not believe that this had happened just like he said. Our field tech began to go on, "Man I have to scrape this stuff off with a screw driver, I'll be surprised if this thing even works...", still speechless. After regaining myself I began looking up the price for a new and refurbished dispenser and at that time our field tech said that he had gotten it working again. I was just about to tell him that they need a new dispenser. I went ahead and told him that if that dispenser went out afterward will have to pay $1400 for a new one.

The moral of this story is...expect the unexpected. No one can be trusted to know what canned air is. xD

I don't know what that is....

Ok this one was something that happened to me the other day.

Tech: Ok, I need to you get a chair...

Guy: I don't know what that is.

Tech: Excuse me Sir? You don't know what a chair is?

(Ok let me tell you, this guy knew flawless English but I did detect a hit of something else in him.)

Tech: Sir, I need you get a chair so that can set this (un named object) on it, you know the thing you sit on.

Guy: I don't know what that is.


(At this point I had him put me back on with hise wife that did in fact know what a chair was and we got the problem fixed.)

Blowed Up!

This is a voice mail one of my buddies got today.

"Hi this is (dude), my ATM done blowed up."


Greatest voice mail ever.

Welcome Message

This one I can accredit to our answering service, they are so stupid. The following is a welcome message on an actual ATM in an undisclosed location.


"It's story telling time for singing, drumming, and dancing!"

...and on the receipt it says, "Don't spend your money on Moonpies."

...make something...

“hey what time can I call you guys?”

“you can call us any time, we have support 24 hours”

“ok good because I wanted to make something, I’ll call you back later”

“….k”

Contributed By: P.H.

Email Flaggers

Tech: Thank you for calling customer support, how may I help you?

Caller: Hi, I was looking at my monthly credit card statement, and I saw a charge on there for 19.95, and a phone number, and I want to know what the **** it was for.

Tech: Ok, and what is your name sir.

(He calls off his name, and after a short pause)

Tech: Ok, I see where you have our dial-up Internet service.

Caller: Is that so I can get my e-mail?

Tech: Well, it's so that you can browse the Internet, do you currently have Internet?

Caller: NO, we stand outside and hold flags! Is this service so that I can check my e-mail?

Tech: Yes, sir, this is so that you can check your e-mail.

Caller: Is this a monthly or a annual charge?

Tech: This is a monthly charge.

Caller: Ok, thank you, I was just wondering. Good-bye.

Tech: Good-bye.


-Contributed By: Dave

Hesitated Excitement

Tech: Ok, now click in the address bar.

Caller: Ok, where is that?

Tech: Should be at the top of the window.

Caller: Where it says, www.google.com

Tech: Yes mam.

Caller: Ahh, just to the right of where it says "Address"

Tech: Yes, mam, now delete what is in the address bar.

Caller (with a worried sound in her voice): You want me to delete Google???

Tech: Yes mam, just delete whatever is there.

Caller (now with a cautious sound in her voice): Oh O K.....

Tech: Ok, now type in this address ........(calls out the address to type in)

(The sound of each key-press is heard as she slowly types in each letter)

Tech: Ok, now press Enter.

Caller: Press what?

Tech: Enter, press the Enter key.

Caller: Where is that?

Tech: On the keyboard, should be right above the Shift key.

Caller: Oh O K...I've never done this before.

(The sound of a single key-press can be heard)

Caller: ...WWOOWW...


-Contributed By: Dave